It was long overdue. The yoga shaming had to end. This Yoga Phenomenon was apparently here to stay and it wasn’t going away until it at least took another middle-aged man’s life. It was time to Man-Up. The straw that broke the camel’s back was the request of my 17 year old son: “C’mon Dad, it’ll be fun”. I wasn’t about to let my fragile male ego be squashed by my not-one-inch-of-body-fat child.
It was time that I attempted a first-ever yoga session at the world famous Parallel Yoga. With much hesitation and trepidation, I made my way to the facility hoping for a quiet Monday night of torture (like who would ever subject themselves to such pain on a Monday night?). Despite my high hopes of relative obscurity, the class was jammed — full of seasoned, in shape, young yoga pros. I could almost read the minds of several whom surely thought that I had entered the wrong building, as the liquor store was only one door down (smart move: yoga then wine, I get it).
I am in relatively decent shape, but there was no question that I was way out of my element. I thought that I could fudge my way through this evening and not make a complete spectacle of myself. Out of sync and as graceful as an angry giraffe, I was only hoping that I looked nothing like Chris Farley in his SNL Chippendales routine (a reference lost on, well, not-middle-aged men).
As I sat down on my unpadded 1/2 millimeter (why?) mat, I couldn’t help but wonder why Instructor Kara sat me so close to the front door. It crossed my mind as perhaps she was allowing me all the grace in the world to make an early, quick and uneventful exit. Perhaps she was allowing herself that very same option with a swift kick to my rear.
In all seriousness, it was an incredible experience that left me exhausted and feeling great. It was ever so apparent that I was being led through the routines by a real professional. Kara took us through the program with the grace and orchestration of a maestro.
Thank you Kara! Fair warning, I will be back!
Darcy is a father of four amazing young humans, who also happens to be an amazing human himself. Thank you Darcy for allowing us to post this great review!